Part of my "foreshadowing" in life, happened tonight.
Back story - and I've talked about it before - there are events, moments and Deja Vu's in our lives. We just don't always listen.
Sometimes I call it "using my power for good". As I believe, we all have the ability to do this - we just don't listen to God, the Universe, the voice in our head - one or all of the above. Either to tell the story, or just keep our mouths shut.
That is, when I do listen. When I listen to that little voice, I'm "Using my powers for good".
Re-entry back to the real world has been as expected. Busy. However, not depressing. Just glad to be back.
BUT, getting back to my other "normal" routine has been a bit difficult.
On the island, I was going to bed at 8 - 9 pm; I had a baby to wake up and take care of. Then I was up at 4 at the latest. Maybe one day at 4:45 for my "baby duty". It was awesome. Tiring. Probably easier because I knew it was only a week.
Upon returning, I've been in bed at the latest at 9:15pm. - COMPLETELY EXHAUSTED. It's all I can do to stay awake until then.
Work is so busy I can't see straight. Wrapping up the hockey season with the banquet tonight. The finale to the inaugural season for the high school team. Back to the real world.
Only, I keep having weird things happen.
I'm thinking about something or someone - then the phone rings telling me what I was thinking about.
Nolan and I were talking about him liking sugar. The next day, there was an article I received about a teenage boy and his sugar addiction and what he did to combat it. (Note, Nolan is under-weight, but still the article was almost verbatim our conversation).
On Tuesday, I woke up at midnight. My first thought? I need to turn off the ringer on my phone. I don't want it to bother me when it goes off. I went to the bathroom, I went back to bed.
Tonight, after the high school banquet, I stopped at my favorite place on the way home. I'm talking to the couple next to me. She's in real estate. We chat for a bit. She then mentions she sold "my crushes" house when he moved from Denver years ago". (Denver's most eligible bachelor - the one whom I've actually quit 'crushing' on). (That's for you Carolyn) I just smiled and let her tell her story.
Tuesday - when I woke up - there were a couple of texts from Peter Pan. I had woken up to turn my phone off.
Tonight - I didn't have the heart to tell her Denver's most eligible bachelor just bought a new place. I guess he didn't call her. She then tells me, "There is a reason I'm supposed to meet you. Do you ever get that feeling?".
I just smiled. "Yes, I know what you mean."
Using my powers for good.
Thursday, March 19, 2015
Thursday, March 12, 2015
The truth is
I always like to say, "I'm the worst secret keeper in the world, but I love surprises."
The truth is though, that statement isn't true. The truth is, I will keep a secret until the end of time - if THAT is what someone else would like me to do.
At first, someone else's secret is a burden. You hold on to it too tight. You walk around carrying someone else's secret. But the truth is, once someone tells you their secret? It's no longer a secret. They have now shifted the burden from them to you.
It's a guilt thing.
Once I tell you "don't tell anyone" and then follow it with a big bad secret - well, you share my burden. The truth is, that isn't true.
A secret is only a secret, if really, only you know. If someone else knows, well, we all know how that goes. I tell a friend not to tell. They then tell a friend not to tell. And on and on and on.
Truth is, I usually forget about things people tell me to keep a secret. The moment someone says, "will you keep this confidential", my eyes just roll. For Heaven's sake, I'm a recruiter. I know how much money people make. I know how much money people DON'T make. I know what it will take you to move for a new job. I know when someone is about to propose.
I KNOW ALL SORTS OF SECRETS.
Only, most of the "secrets" I know; other people know too.
I'm not talking about the things friends know about each other - that's just history. No one ever said "OMG, don't ever tell my mom I was puking off the balcony on spring break."
That's just one of those things you file away. Not worthy of a secret status.
Although, I learned a few years ago after starting the blogs: It's great to put it all out there. Not putting a burden on anyone else.
It helps others live vicariously through you.
By being brutally honest, people tell you thank you and stop you on the street.
It also though, at least for me, makes me hold things a bit tighter. I know the world is wondering what I'll do. The funny thing is - I use to never care what others thought of me.
I guess I still don't. It's just harder to share stories knowing we are all weak, when they hold all your secrets too. Waiting for judgement.
So, the other day, I took a trip. A trip without all my viewers/readers/fans. Just me.
Well, me and I'd like to say some others. But this trip was mine.
But it wasn't.
Long story short. I went on a "helping" trip. I took my pilot friend up on a free buddy flight. I took a week off. From everything. Only - I ended up working and taking care of some sweet girls.
So, tonight, I was bumped from my flight. I was trying to get home. There were no seats on the plane for us free passengers.
The truth is, most people would have been mad at this point. Me:Us beggars can't be choosy.
I wasn't mad. I just no longer had a secret to keep.
I walked straight to the ticket counter. There was a blue-eyed guy standing there looking like he had had a long day.
There was me.
Trying to get home.
"So, I understand there is no getting on this flight." I said to the guy at the ticket counter. He said, "that is correct".
"Any chance you could route me through Kona?
The truth is though, that statement isn't true. The truth is, I will keep a secret until the end of time - if THAT is what someone else would like me to do.
At first, someone else's secret is a burden. You hold on to it too tight. You walk around carrying someone else's secret. But the truth is, once someone tells you their secret? It's no longer a secret. They have now shifted the burden from them to you.
It's a guilt thing.
Once I tell you "don't tell anyone" and then follow it with a big bad secret - well, you share my burden. The truth is, that isn't true.
A secret is only a secret, if really, only you know. If someone else knows, well, we all know how that goes. I tell a friend not to tell. They then tell a friend not to tell. And on and on and on.
Truth is, I usually forget about things people tell me to keep a secret. The moment someone says, "will you keep this confidential", my eyes just roll. For Heaven's sake, I'm a recruiter. I know how much money people make. I know how much money people DON'T make. I know what it will take you to move for a new job. I know when someone is about to propose.
I KNOW ALL SORTS OF SECRETS.
Only, most of the "secrets" I know; other people know too.
I'm not talking about the things friends know about each other - that's just history. No one ever said "OMG, don't ever tell my mom I was puking off the balcony on spring break."
That's just one of those things you file away. Not worthy of a secret status.
Although, I learned a few years ago after starting the blogs: It's great to put it all out there. Not putting a burden on anyone else.
It helps others live vicariously through you.
By being brutally honest, people tell you thank you and stop you on the street.
It also though, at least for me, makes me hold things a bit tighter. I know the world is wondering what I'll do. The funny thing is - I use to never care what others thought of me.
I guess I still don't. It's just harder to share stories knowing we are all weak, when they hold all your secrets too. Waiting for judgement.
So, the other day, I took a trip. A trip without all my viewers/readers/fans. Just me.
Well, me and I'd like to say some others. But this trip was mine.
But it wasn't.
Long story short. I went on a "helping" trip. I took my pilot friend up on a free buddy flight. I took a week off. From everything. Only - I ended up working and taking care of some sweet girls.
So, tonight, I was bumped from my flight. I was trying to get home. There were no seats on the plane for us free passengers.
The truth is, most people would have been mad at this point. Me:Us beggars can't be choosy.
I wasn't mad. I just no longer had a secret to keep.
I walked straight to the ticket counter. There was a blue-eyed guy standing there looking like he had had a long day.
There was me.
Trying to get home.
"So, I understand there is no getting on this flight." I said to the guy at the ticket counter. He said, "that is correct".
"Any chance you could route me through Kona?
Where do I start
It seems I wait a while between posts now. Not because I'm waiting on purpose, but there just doesn't seem to be anything to write.
Then when I come up with a premise, and begin to want to tell a story. I log in to the website. Then I start reading other blogs. Then I think "oh, I should write about this". Or wait a minute, did I tell the story about that. All these other stories come falling out.
And here the whole time I didn't think I had anything to write.
Then when I come up with a premise, and begin to want to tell a story. I log in to the website. Then I start reading other blogs. Then I think "oh, I should write about this". Or wait a minute, did I tell the story about that. All these other stories come falling out.
And here the whole time I didn't think I had anything to write.
Wednesday, February 25, 2015
Towing the line
It sure sucks being a grown-up.
My oldest son is not eligible to play in the play-offs for the high school team.
He missed 5 games for the team. He missed them for club games. (His other team). He some how thought, it would all work out in the end. First of all, he is my child - of course, it's going to work out for him in the end. Second of all, he was marked "there" for one of the games. That is, until he told the athletic director, that was mis-marked.
He was honest.
My first thought was: he was punished for telling the truth.
It would have been found out though. Then the whole team would have been disqualified. Yes, it sucks.
However - here is me. Complaining about the lack of ethics in our kids sports today. Here we have an athletic director willing to stand up and say no.
I mentioned to the athletic director that "the rumor is" so and so on the basketball team ended up getting to play. She told me, tell me whom it is, I will not participate in gossip, but I will not also stand for someone whom is lying.
The athletic director called me today and asked me if I had any questions - actually, I didn't. In fact, I told her, I was super proud to be a part of an organization that held true to the rules. I did tell her, however, if I found out, there were exceptions made for other teams or other players on other teams - I would be the first one in her office and there would be hell to pay.
Then I learned the someone had called the athletic director (still not sure, as once again she was professional), only she said "she" three times, and did say maybe it was my sister?cousin? - I digress - and said they could provide a doctors note for a missed game.
Nice. So, we are teaching our child "there are rules, but if they don't fit you, let's see what we can do".
Not my thing. There are exceptions to rules - yes. Always, but rules are rules and I have to admire those whom stay there.
It sucks to be my son right now. Although, he made these choices. He understood the risk.
He was rewarded from being honest, with a punishment. We all know it would have come out in the end.
I'm proud that he think this sucks. I'm proud he's taking it. The athletic director is standing up for the rules.
The problem is, good behavior for being honest is not rewarded.
However, he knew the rules going in.
My oldest son is not eligible to play in the play-offs for the high school team.
He missed 5 games for the team. He missed them for club games. (His other team). He some how thought, it would all work out in the end. First of all, he is my child - of course, it's going to work out for him in the end. Second of all, he was marked "there" for one of the games. That is, until he told the athletic director, that was mis-marked.
He was honest.
My first thought was: he was punished for telling the truth.
It would have been found out though. Then the whole team would have been disqualified. Yes, it sucks.
However - here is me. Complaining about the lack of ethics in our kids sports today. Here we have an athletic director willing to stand up and say no.
I mentioned to the athletic director that "the rumor is" so and so on the basketball team ended up getting to play. She told me, tell me whom it is, I will not participate in gossip, but I will not also stand for someone whom is lying.
The athletic director called me today and asked me if I had any questions - actually, I didn't. In fact, I told her, I was super proud to be a part of an organization that held true to the rules. I did tell her, however, if I found out, there were exceptions made for other teams or other players on other teams - I would be the first one in her office and there would be hell to pay.
Then I learned the someone had called the athletic director (still not sure, as once again she was professional), only she said "she" three times, and did say maybe it was my sister?cousin? - I digress - and said they could provide a doctors note for a missed game.
Nice. So, we are teaching our child "there are rules, but if they don't fit you, let's see what we can do".
Not my thing. There are exceptions to rules - yes. Always, but rules are rules and I have to admire those whom stay there.
It sucks to be my son right now. Although, he made these choices. He understood the risk.
He was rewarded from being honest, with a punishment. We all know it would have come out in the end.
I'm proud that he think this sucks. I'm proud he's taking it. The athletic director is standing up for the rules.
The problem is, good behavior for being honest is not rewarded.
However, he knew the rules going in.
Thursday, February 19, 2015
Tutu
Talk about getting old...... As of Sunday, I became a Gramma. Sorta.
Not a Grandmother.
Not a Granny - although, I'm reserving that name for one day if I have Grand kids, that's what I want to be called. Granny.That will be my name.
I became a Tutu.
Someone I never thought I would be. Someone better than the insecure girl I thought I was.
Although, I think I knew "Tutu" was going to arrive this year. I'm 45. I always knew there was going to be one to arrive this year. I would have just never believed this would have been the way it would have worked out.
Of course.
Do any of us?
Remember a few years ago, when you I left you in the middle of the ocean? In the middle of my life?
Back to a sweet boy. I was at the hospital when he was born. I was 19. It was 1988.
Do the math. He's 26
Charlotte Grace was born on 2/15/15 at 5:15.
I think her lucky number is 5.
Everyone was told to wait.
"Why aren't you here Aunt Leasa?"
Yes, Auntie's have privileges mom's don't. Moms can't be there for a month. But, "Aunt Leasa - I wish you were here"
That's the thing.
The thing about aunties. Cousins. Other special family members. We have special spots.
I wish I could explain it better. I wish I could tell you how someone whom doesn't have their blood running through their veins. I wish I could say so much more.
What I can really say?
I'm to young to be called Grandma.
In Hawaiian, Grand Mother is called Tutu.
When I met you Todd, I wasn't ready to be called Mom.
I'm ready to be called Tutu.......
Not a Grandmother.
Not a Granny - although, I'm reserving that name for one day if I have Grand kids, that's what I want to be called. Granny.That will be my name.
I became a Tutu.
Someone I never thought I would be. Someone better than the insecure girl I thought I was.
Although, I think I knew "Tutu" was going to arrive this year. I'm 45. I always knew there was going to be one to arrive this year. I would have just never believed this would have been the way it would have worked out.
Of course.
Do any of us?
Remember a few years ago, when you I left you in the middle of the ocean? In the middle of my life?
Back to a sweet boy. I was at the hospital when he was born. I was 19. It was 1988.
Do the math. He's 26
Charlotte Grace was born on 2/15/15 at 5:15.
I think her lucky number is 5.
Everyone was told to wait.
"Why aren't you here Aunt Leasa?"
Yes, Auntie's have privileges mom's don't. Moms can't be there for a month. But, "Aunt Leasa - I wish you were here"
That's the thing.
The thing about aunties. Cousins. Other special family members. We have special spots.
I wish I could explain it better. I wish I could tell you how someone whom doesn't have their blood running through their veins. I wish I could say so much more.
What I can really say?
I'm to young to be called Grandma.
In Hawaiian, Grand Mother is called Tutu.
When I met you Todd, I wasn't ready to be called Mom.
I'm ready to be called Tutu.......
Thursday, February 5, 2015
Manifesting
In my my life, I believe in manifesting things.
By this, me personally mean, "If I truly believe something will happen. It will. It may not happen the way I thought it would, but it happens. Of course it does. It just doesn't happen when/where we thought it would happen.
One of my favorite moments over the holidays was me standing face to face with a guy I wanted to love forever.
That's the only way I can describe our friendship.
The truth is, at the time we met each other, if we had told each other this was the "ending" to the story. Well, we wouldn't have believed it.
I love him more than I love Peter Pan.
How many people can say that out loud?
He says to me, "You know, I love you." "Yes, I know this. This is how we were supposed to do things together.". I know we did the Disney family adventure with each other. I know we did all this craziness together.
This is just how we were supposed to do this together.
Then tonight, I run into "my coach". You know, the one. The coach. The one where we are supposed to have a crush, but keep going.
Two hours later.
He's ordering more wine. Once again, He's ordering more wine. I'm sitting at his table. Talking to him. Talking to his 'coach'. Talking to the team whom thinks they are going to win tomorrow night
Talking to the other team coach. (red wings)
Knowing this was all how this was going to be.
I left.
He was flirting with the girl next to me. Good for her.
In my mind, he's still wondering what I'm doing.
I did the "Good Thing, Bad Thing, Funny Thing" at the table tonight
Yes, me, with him. With you.
The woman next to me think it's God.
It think it's a bit of both. A little of nothing. A lot of everything.
By this, me personally mean, "If I truly believe something will happen. It will. It may not happen the way I thought it would, but it happens. Of course it does. It just doesn't happen when/where we thought it would happen.
One of my favorite moments over the holidays was me standing face to face with a guy I wanted to love forever.
That's the only way I can describe our friendship.
The truth is, at the time we met each other, if we had told each other this was the "ending" to the story. Well, we wouldn't have believed it.
I love him more than I love Peter Pan.
How many people can say that out loud?
He says to me, "You know, I love you." "Yes, I know this. This is how we were supposed to do things together.". I know we did the Disney family adventure with each other. I know we did all this craziness together.
This is just how we were supposed to do this together.
Then tonight, I run into "my coach". You know, the one. The coach. The one where we are supposed to have a crush, but keep going.
Two hours later.
He's ordering more wine. Once again, He's ordering more wine. I'm sitting at his table. Talking to him. Talking to his 'coach'. Talking to the team whom thinks they are going to win tomorrow night
Talking to the other team coach. (red wings)
Knowing this was all how this was going to be.
I left.
He was flirting with the girl next to me. Good for her.
In my mind, he's still wondering what I'm doing.
I did the "Good Thing, Bad Thing, Funny Thing" at the table tonight
Yes, me, with him. With you.
The woman next to me think it's God.
It think it's a bit of both. A little of nothing. A lot of everything.
Tuesday, February 3, 2015
Manic Monday
Somehow, I've been recruiting people for companies off and on for over 20 years. I'm not quite sure how this happened.
No one ever says when they are 10: "When I grow up, I want to be a recruiter". In fact, most people don't even know what recruiting is.
People think "recruiters" help people get jobs. Yes. We do that. But really, it's the opposite - we help companies find the right people for their organization.
The difference?
Our paycheck.
Companies are the ones who pay the recruiters. Not the individuals whom are looking for a new position. In a way, we are like real estate agents. But in recruiting, there is no "buyers agent" - only a company agent".
Things I've heard before from candidates:
No one ever says when they are 10: "When I grow up, I want to be a recruiter". In fact, most people don't even know what recruiting is.
People think "recruiters" help people get jobs. Yes. We do that. But really, it's the opposite - we help companies find the right people for their organization.
The difference?
Our paycheck.
Companies are the ones who pay the recruiters. Not the individuals whom are looking for a new position. In a way, we are like real estate agents. But in recruiting, there is no "buyers agent" - only a company agent".
Things I've heard before from candidates:
- I need you to find me a job
- I know someone whom needs a job
- I'm in your database, why haven't you found me something?
- No thanks, I'm not interested in that position. Why didn't they hire me for the other position.
- Oh sorry (that is if they even call), I didn't go to that interview because I decided that job/company/title wasn't for me. (Yes, even after I told you I was interested)
It's a dance.
Of course, I've had companies do the following:
- Stop calling back after 3 rounds of interviews with great candidates.
- Wait the six months AFTER our contract ends, and hire a candidate. Result being I don't get paid.
- Start out with one job description, but really want something completely different.
This is a MANIC business.
About once or twice a month, I think "I'm done.". Then the next day, I'm out there on a scavenger hunting trying to find a perfect candidate for my client.
Sometimes I find them. Sometimes I don't. Then I do find a great candidate and I call a couple of my clients to see if they have any open positions.
Some days it works.
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