Friday, September 30, 2016

Don't tell anyone

I started a new contract position for recruiting last week.

Sorta an employee, just no benefits. Hourly rates.

And the most honest, breath-relasing moment was the thought that popped in my head.

Ah, this feels really, really nice.

The last few months of my life have provided tons of sadness and anxiety. I do want to write more about moments these last few months - but we have been in survival mode around here.

But this.

This "job"

This " guy I've been dating"

This "backbone I always knew I had"

This "backbone of community I knew was here"

Have given me a whole new perspective on life. In life.

Shh..... don't tell anyone. I haven't slept in months. I've gained some stress weight. And I've worked my whole life to be right here.

Shh.... this is where you find out what you are really made of.

Don't tell anyone, but now that I'm here. I always knew I was this capable.  

Monday, September 19, 2016

Growing Up

When you sign in for security on a website - one of the security questions is:

What street did you grow up on?

I have an easy answer. I lived on the same street for quite a bit while I was in elementary school. That street is the one I usually name.

Although, I've been thinking a lot about this question lately.

If Peter Pan and I were ever asked how we knew each other, I would always reply:

We grew up together

Only, in "practical" terms, I didn't meet him until I was 32. But if you were to ask me today, I would still give you the same answer. "We grew up together."

The street I live on now - I've lived here for longer than I've ever lived any other time in my life. I do wonder what military family kids think of "as the street they grew up on"

I was raised thinking that "grew up on" meant "the longest time you spent in a place".

I've realized "growing up" has nothing to do with age. Or how long you have been in one place.

It has to do with how much you grew. And where you grew.

I may have been raised in Texas, but I grew up here.

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

No words

There have been no posts lately. As there have been no words.

Last Sunday, August 28, 2016 there was another death in our little bubble of a community.

Something no one saw coming.


An 18 year old family friend. Friend of Duncan's. We are friends with the family. As in, a friends family we were all supposed to be in Rhode Island with for Labor Day. Wait - the kids weren't going - just us adults.

There are no words for the heartbreak our neighborhood has been hit with these last two months.

There were some okay moments during all of this. Moments that and will continue to make us smile.

The words will come again. I do still have some wonderful Olympic stories to share.

But for now, there are no words.....