The way it works out

The Gypsy Girl personality who lives in my body was well behaved for quite a while.

She let the leaders lead.

THEN,

She came out and was a bit reckless in Vegas. I think it's because the hockey mom and career woman were in charge for way to long. Squelshing the Gypysy Girl.  We have to remember to let her out every once in a while.

SO,

Six days back from a trip to Vegas. One week before leaving for July - Gypsy Girl announces loudly - "I'm coming out"........

And, she did.

3 Round-trip last minute tickets to California for the weekend. I texted the boys. One was caddying. The other at his dads.

"Pack your bags, we leave for Orange County at 3:30".

My excuse: My friend in Cali, his daughter was graduating high school. But the ceremony was over. We were just going for the parties.

The real reason:  This transition into the next stage of life, is actually harder than I thought it would be. We need this family time. Me and my boys. My boys needed to see their uncle. I needed to see his mom.

I'm not sure which personality needed this, but I was thinking all of them did. All of mine. All of my sons. All of the people we were with. We needed to all be together.

It was a great weekend.

Fun stories of the boys. Fun stories from "Mum".

For whatever weird reason, the boys and I were invited to the daughters mom's house for a graduation party - only her dad and his parents were not.

The boys and I went.


Okay - I give up. I've re-written this story four times now. I keep trying to put in the back story. But it's not flowing.

Here's the point: At the end of the weekend. The weekend of chaos, friendship and love it all came down to this.

Mum kept saying "I can't believe it never worked out between the two of you". (Me and my friend in Cali) Even Duncan on Sunday night proclaims, "she's not going to let this go, is she?" I did reply, "it's been almost 30 years, so, no, she's not."

Looking out at the pool, sitting next to each other: With his wife in the water with her daugthers, my sons dancing on the "concrete bar", music playing, we look at each other and say,

"It did work out"

This is how it worked out.



PS - Gypsy girl will be out soon - and she knows how to write..... :-)

Only one?

I'm in Vegas. For my girlfriends dads 75th birthday.

My first real "vacation" in years.  Now, now - I know I travel. Altthough on my other "vacations" I tend to work. As I work from home. I work from anyone's home.

Not this time.

I worked today. Until noon. Then I set my auto-responder. You know the thing that will automatically reply to the emails you receive. It states: I'm on holiday. I have no access to e-mail, phone, text or internet. I will get back to you on Monday, June 22, 2015. If this is a true emergency, please call XXXXXXXXX and left the name of the person to contact.

I haven't done this in years. In fact, even when I went to Europe, I didn't set the vacation response. This time, I'm checking out.

No e-mail. No phone. No internet.

Bliss.

A funny thing keeps happening though. I check in to the hotel. The lady asks: "Is anyone joining you?" I reply, "Not that I know of, yet". :-) "I'll let you know".

I go to lunch today.

The Hostess asks:  "Just you?"

The bar at the pool: "Only you?"

I've traveled tons in my adult life. A majority of it by myself.  Not once have I ever been asked if it was just me.

Some ladies today at the pool suggested I needed to come up with a witty comeback. It has never even occured to me.

What a society we have become.

Can't people travel alone?

Although it's funny, the thing I've notice most in my travels alone? The people traveling 'with' someone tend to be all alone....

Birthday Blessings

My birthday was last week.

I'm really over counting and caring about birthdays. I'm glad I still have birthdays. Hopefully, I have many more to come.

With the onset of "social media", the "world" knows it's your birthday. LinkedIn - the "work" social network. Facebook - the "social" network".

I'm not sure what the difference was this year. My birthday fell on a Friday. I'm not a "going out on Friday" kinda gal. Friday nights are nice to stay home. If I'm going to go meet friends, I'd rather meet them on a Wednesday or Thursday. I'm tired on Friday's.

I've had some fun birthday "parties" - excuses to see people I know on my birthday. This year, as well as last, I've not really cared. I planned to meet two girlfriends on Friday night.

You know what?

Over 100 people reached out to me this year to say "Happy Birthday" - granted 3/4 were on social media. Plus the people I've been working with, but the texts, the phone calls, the messages were incredible.

NEVER have so many people reached out. It made me think. I'm usually pretty thoughtful - to at least send a message to someone.

Now I need to make sure I do.

It made my day. My week. My year.

I am blessed with good people in my life.

One Chance

One Chance

One Moment

One ticket to the big dance.

One opportunity.

We think this is what life is like. We have a split second to make a decision or we will have regrets for the rest of our life. Right?  That's what society tells us. Go, or you will miss your opportunity.

Maybe.

Yes, you heard it from the daydream believer. Maybe.

Maybe not.

Yes, some opportunities are in the moment. The last football game of your senior year. Yes, that moment is the last one you will EVER have.

BUT, there are also other moments coming in your life.

No, it won't be THAT moment. THAT moment you were in granted in life. THAT chance you had to stand on the field of a play-off game your senior year in high school.

You were sick that night. You missed that night. Or you were there, when there were three seconds left in the game and your team won. You had THAT moment. No one ever tells you, "You will get many 'moments' in life.

Then though, we get caught up in "what if I DON"T do this?" "What if this opportunity is presenting itself and I'll never get another one?"

This is where we get stuck in the next phase of our life. In my opinion anyway.

I keep thinking, if I don't commit to whatever the situation is, I'm going to miss it.

My youngest son turns 16 this summer. I'm going to have two teenagers driving. They have a car to share. I have a car that is 10 years old.

I was thinking it's time for a new to me car.

You know, the fun little car, I haven't had in a long time........

I've been pretending to look for cars for a bit. Pretending to also not to look.

The right car will find me.

I found the car I wanted. Met every, single specification I wanted.

Only - it's JUNE!

I don't want a car until August.

Today, I was in a panic.  I wanted this car.

I wanted this guy

I wanted this start-up to work

I wanted it all to work out TODAY. I might miss my moment.

Then I quit holding my breath.




I'll live if this someone else buys my car (although it's white!), and someone else marries the guy I wanted.

There are other start-ups, other guys and definetly other cars.

There is more than one chance.  This I know.

Keep Dancing

There is a woman I "know" whom lives in Atlanta. I use the term "know" loosely.

We've never actually met.

Someone connected me to her, once upon a time. She needed to hire someone. She hired my candidate.

Really, that was the end of the story.

This of course was before "social media" was "defined". A time when if you met someone, you connected to them on every type of social media you could. We became "friends" on Facebook.

Today, if someone I know from work sends me a request on Facebook to be a "friend", I politely tell them Facebook is for family and close friends. If they would like to stay connected on a professional level, please connect to me on LinkedIn. (A work "social" network").

But at the time I met Bobbi, well, you "friended" people you "knew".

She's hysterical.

I love her posts. I love the things she complains about - even though I might not agree. I also love the random thing shes posts.

But most of all, I love how she inspires me.

She six or so years ago, she was taking ballroom dancing lessons. She even got to a competitor level (I think).

She recruits during the day. Dances all night.

And as with anything, that hobby seemed to wane.

Next thing I know, she's got a puppy - all bent on training him. Then a few years later, gardening. A few years after that, learning to be a yoga instructor.

I don't know if she actually applies the things she is learning to her "job". You know, that thing that actually pays her bills.

I do know she supports herself. I do know she views her "job" as something that she must do to pay her bills. I also know, she keeps "learning".

Trying.

Something new. A new way to make herself grow. Even if it's not forever. It's something new.

Just keep..........

Alcohol - The new cigarette?

If you look back at "vices" of an earlier generation, it's always a bit different than the current generation.

Being a child of the 70's - you remember when the anti-smoking campaigns came out. Encouraging people not to smoke. To cut back. Eventually, to stop smoking. Smoking was bad. Bad for everyone.

The next "phase", in my mind, was AIDS. This was the next "big" epidemic to hit society. Once again, pulling from the memory banks here. Of course, AIDS wasn't viewed as a choice. Actually, it probably was - it was viewed as punishment for wild behavior. The big anti-sex campaign in life.

We are now at alcohol. This article came out this week. Maybe it's the people I hang out with. Maybe it is society. Everything does revolve around alcohol.

Oh, there is a wine tasting on Thursday night.
There is an opening of an event next Wednesday - there will be free beer and sangria.
The number one commercial at Super Bowl? Budweiser

We put on the end of the year hockey banquet for the high school kids, I didn't have alcohol served. The event was two hours long.

You would have thought I had committed a federal crime by not allowing adults to buy alcohol.

Is this what is was like with cigarettes?

Of course, now in Colorado, marijuana is legal. That was illegal.

Everything is cyclical.

Once upon a time, we outlawed alcohol.  Are we back?

How the story ends

How does the story begin?

A boy and a girl meet each other.

Timing is everything in life. We kinda go into situations thing we know the outcome. Or rather, the outcome, we want.

Sometimes, it works. (Hollywood has taught us that). Sometimes, it turns out different (better/worse) than the other way you thought it would.

Actually, it always works. It works out the way its supposed too.

I always wondered if I could truly "let it all go". Say good-bye to the version of the story we wanted.
Do we hang on to things we don't have? Or are we hanging on to things we create? Not the real version?

I'm pretty good at letting go. I'm also really bad (in meaning good), at hanging on to things we should let go. But, don't we all want to be the favorite?

Years ago, Pan, from the islands had to come to visit. Truly, he came to visit three times. But that's not what "got me". All I could think was "You want to be here with me, but you are never going to let go of the past.". I knew that.

So when Peter Pan showed up during that time, all I could think was: "So, this is how it ends". We won't ever "be with each other, but we can't let each other go, either".

Really?

We so cling to things that we WANT. Then we hang on. Because that's what we know. What we are told.

Then this village of people whom I love, want something different than the way society thinks it should be.

At this point, I keep trying to say something that I have conjured out of my mind. But, I'm at a loss.

Stuck between what IS going to happen and what we think will think will happen.

I'm a girl - we over think things.

I tried to come home.

I had drinks with my "daughters" dad. And, I was mad, and sad all at once. But, I think I got an apology and a thank you all in the same conversation.

The story said good-bye and Mahalo all at once.

The kids were told about the drinks. They are now family to each other.

But that morning I was laying in my bed talking to Pan, it wasn't him that I wanted at the finish line. Because, things aren't that simple. I still understand why he wants to be with her. It's actually okay.

I miss Peter Pan whom lives in the Caribbean.

When I tell people about our house swap story. I tell them of Pan and Peter Pan and the Hockey Mom and the Hair Guy, and the hockey coach, we all get confused. People tell me, "This isn't how the story ends", I reply, "You've been watching too much Hollywood".

Life is messy. You might get a Hollywood Ending - the problem is, Hollywood forgot to follow up. Hollywood doesn't show you the middle. In fact, you might get a couple of Hollywood endings in life.

This isn't the ending to the story. Or maybe it is the ending of one story.

Or, maybe it's a commerical break. Remember, Hollywood gets those.